So I'm grounded...

Well I'm grounded because mama is mad at me for buying a homecoming dress. SHe said I knew I had stuff to pay for, and I still spent money on something stupid. She showed up at my work friday night, she was waiting for me when I got off. She made me get in the car with her, while she yelled at me, and wanted to kno where the hell all of my money went!!! I asked her where the hell she though all of my money went! Car insurance, paying for her son's lunch at school everyday, gas to take him to school, home, and community service, my car payment, cell phone bills, and yes I bought a freaking homecoming dress! SHOOT ME, I BOUGHT ONE THING FOR MYSELF! She had the nerve to ask me if I was on drugs!!!!!! she said because she didn't knwo what else I could be spending my money on! I probably shouldn't have said it but I was like no I'm not a fu*k up like you, and well that was not the smartest thing I have ever said. She got really pissed and told me to get the hell out of her car and come straight home. I was just like what ever. she followed me home and when she would pull up beside me at a stop light she wouild not even look over at me. I don't care anymore. She makes me feel like nothing every single day, and it's about time she feels how she makes me feel. It's my money! I WORK FOR IT! I work for two freaking weeks for absolutely nothing, because as soon as I get paid, my whole check is gone. and it sure as hell is not spent on anything that I want. She took my phone, ashe wouldnt let me go anywhere. She made me miss my meeting with Lila, which I really needed to go to this week. she wouldn't let me go anywhere. I couldn't even use my phone to call and tell Lila that I couldnt come until almost four-when the meeting was supposed to start, and only then because I told her I HAD to call school and see what time the SAT prep was. The more I am around her, the older I get the more I start to detest her. I don't want to hate her, she is my mom, but I just can't let myself forgive her for all she has put me through, when she's stull doing it. I don't know I just feel so overwelmed with everything. I havn't been able to sleep all that great, I've had flashbacks, I've just felt like pure shit this entire week. UHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I'm just sick of it all.